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  • One year on: Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino by Arctic Monkeys

    Arctic Monkeys
    Left to right: Jamie Cook (guitar), Nick O’Malley (bass), Alex Turner (lead singer), Matt Helders (drums)

    Arctic Monkeys are my all time favourite band. No one else has ever made music that has spoken to me in quite the way they have. I own all six of the albums they have released to date, I know every one of their songs and the brilliant lyrics of their frontman Alex Turner have accompanied me through my highest of highs and lowest of lows.

    On 11th May 2018, the Sheffield band released Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino, their first new material for nearly five years. It was a completely different sound, led by the piano, which left some fans used to them thrashing on guitars upset. I loved it, however, and love it even more now as it reaches its first anniversary. I’ll tell you why.

    Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino is a collection of eleven songs loosely based around the idea that the human race has colonised the moon and opened a hotel and casino complex on it. Yet, the aesthetic feels like the 1970s. You need only to look at the video for the title track to see what I mean.

    Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino

    Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino is meant to feel like a place you can go and spend a while. Tranquility Base was the name given to the area of the moon that Apollo 11 landed on in July 1969.


    I liked the idea of naming [the album] after a place, because to me records that I’ve been in love with and continue to be in love with feel like they’re places that you can go for a while.

    Alex Turner, Arctic Monkeys

    For me, it absolutely achieves that aim. I have listened to the album hundreds of times, often when I’ve got into my car after a tedious day of pushing trolleys around a supermarket car park. Heading to Tranquility Base for 41 minutes is a great way to escape the mundanities of real life.

    In these days of cherry-picking individual songs on streaming services, it was a bold move to release a proper album – a collection of songs designed to be listened to as a whole, in a particular order. The end of One Point Perspective actually blends in to the beginning of American Sports to emphasise this.

    The album is full of quotable lines. You get the feeling Turner was enjoying himself writing it, relishing the freedom its other-worldly setting was affording him. The genre of science fiction is often used as a method of commenting on our own world, as if taking a step back and looking at it from a different perspective offers the opportunity to say things you might not feel comfortable with otherwise.

    Turner does this in the song Golden Trunks. He had always steered clear of politics in his lyrics, but with this album he felt able to have a little stab at it.


    The leader of the free world
    Reminds you of a wrestler wearing tight golden trunks

    Golden Trunks

    I don’t know about you, but I get a rather unpleasant image of Donald Trump in my head after hearing that.

    Music is saturated with love songs. Turner wanted to give them a swerve after several of them appeared on Everything You’ve Come To Expect, the 2016 album he made with his side project The Last Shadow Puppets. A couple made their way onto this album, though, with the closing track The Ultracheese being the most gushing. It is this song that contains my favourite line of the whole album.


    Oh, the dawn won’t stop weighing a tonne
    I’ve done some things that I shouldn’t have done
    But I haven’t stopped loving you once

    The last lines of the album’s closing track The Ultracheese

    Whenever I hear that, the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. It’s such a great observation about love – we mess up sometimes, but we never stop loving.

    In September last year, I saw Arctic Monkeys on their UK tour at the Sheffield Arena. It was a dream come true, seeing my heroes in the flesh in their hometown. The aesthetic they had created with the album carried on perfectly – the stage design, the clothes the band wore and even their hairstyles complemented Tranquility Base wonderfully.

    Wide shot of the stage at Sheffield Arena as Arctic Monkeys performed
    Seeing Arctic Monkeys live at Sheffield Arena in September 2018

    Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino is a brilliant, mature, visceral album that I will be listening to for years to come. I hope you give it a try.

    Track list (click on song to listen)

    1. Star Treatment
    2. One Point Perspective
    3. American Sports
    4. Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino
    5. Golden Trunks
    6. Four Out Of Five
    7. The World’s First Ever Monster Truck Front Flip
    8. Science Fiction
    9. She Looks Like Fun
    10. Batphone
    11. The Ultracheese

    Now watch Arctic Monkeys perform the opening track, Star Treatment, live at TRNSMT festival in Glasgow from July 2018.

  • ‘No one cares’ – the infuriating misogyny on the internet

    I know I shouldn’t.

    I know I shouldn’t rise to it. I know they are on the wind up. Looking for a reaction. Reeling me in.

    But I just can’t help it.

    I’m referring to people on Twitter who reply to any – and I mean any – post about women’s sport with the words ‘no one cares’.

    A blokey bloke claiming to speak for every man in Britain

    It’s incredibly irritating. It’s so fundamentally incorrect, so infuriatingly dismissive and so annoyingly pompous. Who are they to speak for everyone? They might not care themselves, fine, but they don’t speak for me.

    Personally, if I don’t care about something I don’t spend my time commenting on tweets about it making it clear to everyone that I am not interested. I like most sports but golf and Formula 1 leave me cold. I am well aware that millions of people love them, though, so I leave them to it. It’s the way these blokes – and it is always blokes – desperately need to tell everyone that they don’t care about women’s sport that gets to me.

    Another bloke

    It is most often ‘no one cares’. That’s the textbook blokey casually sexist reply. Sometimes it’s a snide comment on the size of the crowds at a women’s sporting event. Sometimes it’s more explicit, with suggestions that the players ‘should be in the kitchen’ or that there would be more interest if the players were in bikinis.

    Joking or not, comments like these are wrong. It’s 2019 now. Shouldn’t we have moved on from these tired cliches? Jokes require an element of humour, and there’s nothing funny about them.

    Women’s sport is in a fantastic place right now, and getting better all the time. As I write this, the England football team are on the verge of winning the SheBelieves Cup. The England cricket team are world champions, having beaten India in front of a crowd of around 25,000 at Lord’s in 2017. And who could forget the Great Britain hockey team’s thrilling gold medal at Rio 2016?

    England’s women’s cricket team won the World Cup in 2017

    When England’s women played the Netherlands in the semi-finals of Euro 2017, 4 million people watched it on Channel 4. This was the biggest UK audience for a women’s football match to date, and the match got double the average audience of that day’s episode of Celebrity Big Brother. This is solid proof that ‘no one cares’ is plainly wrong.

    This is not about wanting to fight a battle on behalf of women. This just really irritates me. When I’ve engaged with the people who make these comments, I’m usually met with denial. Nobody cares mate. These facts you’re telling me are made up. Sometimes I’m told that I’m in the ‘PC (politically correct) brigade’. I’m not. It’s not PC to not hate, or be frightened of, women. Because that’s what these men are. They will deny it until they are red in the face but they’re are afraid that these women playing sport threatens their masculinity.

    Once, I was given the bizarre response that I am only defending women’s sport because I think it would make women want to sleep with me. I mean, really? How shallow can you be? That one wasn’t even worthy of a reaction.

    This bloke can only imagine caring about women’s sport if it was in the pursuit of sex

    I felt like writing this because I am sick of calling out the ‘no one cares’ blokes on Twitter. I thought I’d write very clearly why they are wrong and link them to it in future.

    Women’s sport is on the rise and that should be celebrated. It doesn’t need some bloke on social media dismissing it. Let’s not let them.

  • What England can take from the Sri Lanka Tests

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    England beat Sri Lanka 3-0 in the Test series

    England have become only the third team ever to go to Sri Lanka and whitewash them in a Test series. They may not have their great players any more, such as Mahela Jayawardene or Kumar Sangakkara, but Sri Lanka remain a very difficult opponent in their own conditions. They beat South Africa 2-0 in a Test series back in July, thrashing the Proteas in both matches, so it is without a doubt a fine effort from Joe Root’s team. Here I have picked out five key things for England to take away from the tour.

    Openers

    Rory Burns was the popular choice to succeed Alastair Cook at the top of the order, but he leaves Sri Lanka with only one half century to his name. Burns is probably best suited to facing pace bowling, which there was precious little of in this series. He needs to be given the chance to show what he can do in the Caribbean, and I can see him opening the batting in next summer’s Ashes.

    Keaton Jennings might have considered himself fortunate to be on the tour but there was a logic to his selection. He is actually a very competent player of spin, and he showed that in his century in the second innings in Galle. Jennings is much maligned and clearly has a weakness against seam bowling, so it’s hard to tell whether he’ll be lining up against Australia next year. What is not in doubt, though, is his fielding ability – some of the catches he took at short leg over the three Tests were nothing short of ridiculous.

    Number 3

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    Jonny Bairstow made a statement with his century in Colombo

    England have not had a settled number 3 in the batting order since the retirement of Jonathan Trott, and it remains a problem position for them. I suppose this links in with how fragile the openers have been, as the next man in has had to do a lot of the early work. They used three different batsmen in the role in the three Tests – Moeen Ali, Ben Stokes and Jonny Bairstow. Moeen just doesn’t seem to be up to it, Stokes was only given the one chance, but Bairstow made the most of his opportunity with a hundred in Colombo.

    He might not even have been picked for the match if Sam Curran had been fit, but the Yorkshireman was clearly determined to make a point after slipping out of the side following his ankle injury. The injury, picked up during a game of football, prompted a lot of moaning about cricketers warming up in such a way. The fact is, Bairstow could have turned his ankle over anywhere – walking down the stairs in the team hotel, for example. Football is a good way of loosening up the muscles and getting the blood flowing, and the players love it. Personally, I think a lot of the complaints had a snobbish air to them. A lot of people don’t want the gentleman cricketers playing such a common game. There has also been the frankly ridiculous argument that ‘you never see footballers warming up with a game of cricket’. Well, if cricket was a proven way to prepare the body for exercise, you may well have done.

    Whether Bairstow is England’s number 3 going forward is not clear. He may just have been so set on scoring big runs in the third Test that he would have made them wherever he batted in the order. I do think he will be in the position in the West Indies, and this may have to be his new role in the team now it looks like he won’t be getting the wicketkeeping gloves back.

    Wicketkeeper

    Ben Foakes was the best thing about the tour for England. He had been on the fringes of the team for a while, without ever breaking into it. Having not even been in the squad when it was initially announced, few would have expected him to end up the leading run scorer in the series. But he started off superbly in Galle with a debut century, showing the top order how to bat, and has made wicketkeeping a thing of beauty with his flawless glovework. Sorry Jonny, but England have found their wicketkeeper. Foakes has been widely regarded as the best gloveman in the country for a while now, and in the year he was a county champion with Surrey things are certainly going well for him.

    Adil Rashid

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    Adil Rashid took career best figures in Colombo but is a luxury bowler

    England played three spinners in every Test in the series, and it is hard to imagine them doing that anywhere other than the subcontinent. Moeen Ali, Jack Leach and Adil Rashid all had major roles to play, bowling the vast majority of the overs and taking nearly all the wickets. Moeen found a happy knack of getting regular wickets, and was vital in the second innings in Galle to seal the win for England when it looked like Sri Lanka had a chance. Leach is a very tidy bowler, and took his maiden five wicket haul in the second Test. He also seems to love every second of playing for England, pretty much to the point of not being able to stop smiling, which is great to see. Rashid bowled the fewest overs of the three spinners, and goes for a lot more runs than the other two, but he showed his worth with a five-for in Colombo which enabled England to take control of the match.

    Rashid looks the most likely to miss out when conditions necessitate more seamers in the side. He is something of a luxury spinner, who will bowl the occasional unplayable delivery but will leak runs in the meantime. Moeen will probably be in the side more often than not, as he will nearly always take wickets and England like players who can do a bit of everything. Leach looks like he could well be the long term spinner in the side, the kind of go-to bowler that Graeme Swann was. His ability to keep it tight and hold up an end will be very useful.

    Anderson and Broad

    While the Sri Lanka tour has been very successful, it has taught us nothing about how England will deal with life after Jimmy Anderson and Stuart Broad. Anderson played in the first two Tests and took just the one wicket – not unexpected in a country with conditions that so favour spin bowling. Broad came in for the last match and bowled only 14 wicketless overs. Many saw the Colombo Test as the opportunity to give Ollie Stone a go, with the series already won and the pressure off. There was an argument for this, but it’s hard to see what knowledge of Stone we would have gained from playing him in such difficult conditions. Decisions will have to be made sooner rather than later as Anderson and Broad head towards retirement but I am really not sure Sri Lanka was ever going to be the place to find solutions.

  • Whiny Wilder rubs tired City’s noses in it

    I nicknamed Chris Wilder, the Sheffield United manager, ‘Whiny’ after his hilariously bitter reaction to losing to Norwich earlier this season. Not only does he look like what I see in my mind’s eye when I think of the typical Brexit voter, but Wilder lost all credibility when he tried to blame the City coach driver for his side’s defeat.

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    Chris ‘Whiny’ Wilder

    All this made it all the more galling this afternoon when Whiny Wilder walked over to the Blades fans pumping his fists in the air having just taken the three points from Carrow Road. While I will never be able to take him seriously after his rant, they clearly love him, and you’d expect that having finally got them out of League One and taking a group of bang average players into the top six more than halfway through the Championship season.

    Norwich’s heroic performance against Chelsea on Wednesday had done the world of good for the club’s image, with disillusioned City fans getting firmly back on board and the casual BBC One viewer being impressed with the effort put in against the champions. Having worked so hard at Stamford Bridge, however, and with such a thin squad it was inevitable that tiredness would be a factor. Daniel Farke would have been keen to avoid using that as an excuse, but it was clear that there were weary legs among the City team and while they huffed and puffed they didn’t have enough to win today.

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    City’s efforts at Chelsea in midweek put them at a disadvantage today

    Sheffield United’s first goal, early on, could have been defended better but really it was a pot shot that happened to find the net. Their second, coming just as Norwich looked to be close to an equaliser, came through the combination of an ill advised Alex Tettey backpass and the poor decision of Angus Gunn not to charge out of his goal to try and clear. Gunn has been brilliant this season, but from my vantage point in the Barclay I do think this was his error. By choosing to stay on his line he made it too easy for the striker.

    I overheard on the way out of the ground that, yet again, it was a defender that had to score Norwich’s goal. While left back Jamal Lewis was the scorer against Chelsea, right back Ivo Pinto gave us hope very soon after Sheffield United’s second – but it wasn’t to be. With James Maddison having an off day (which he is allowed, ignoring the fact he was being kicked all over the place by Sheffield United’s players) it was left to Nelson Oliveira to get a goal from a forward position. Nelson continued to do what he’d done for most of this season, though, and that is spray it all over the place. Norwich need to sign a striker and they need to do it soon. Before the end of January.

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    Ivo Pinto, Norwich captain and goalscorer

    When these two teams met at Bramall Lane, the Sheffield United fans could not accept that Norwich had simply done a job on them and they had been beaten by the better side on the day. They, like their manager, were incredibly bitter about City’s so-called ‘antics’. There was nothing unusual about what City did that day. Every team, every single one, will do their best to waste a bit of time when they are protecting a narrow lead away from home. Ironically, this is exactly what Sheffield United did today. They didn’t win the game through beautiful football, they closed it out by wasting time. So despite some of the Blades fans saying they ‘wouldn’t want to support a team that plays like that’, it turns out that they do and are quite happy about it.

    It was another irritating home defeat for Norwich but we must not get too down about it. It was clear at Chelsea that there is something building under Daniel Farke and I think it might be next season before we really see the benefit of it. From what I’ve seen today, I can’t see Sheffield United sustaining a promotion push either. Their squad is nothing special and they should be happy with a top half finish. City may have come up short today, but at least you won’t find our manager blaming the opposition’s coach driver for it.

  • Walking the line

    Three things I love are London, walking and disused railway lines. That makes this book seem like it was almost written with me in mind.

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    The morning after the Arsenal v Norwich match I decided to do one of the walks in the book, starting at Finsbury Park.

    The park itself often hosts big name musicians. In 2014, my favourite band Arctic Monkeys played two gigs there and this week Liam Gallagher announced he would be playing Finsbury Park in June 2018.

    My walk followed the route of a planned extension to the Northern Line of the London Underground which was never completed.

    What I enjoy about disused railway lines is imagining what they once looked like, seeing how they have changed with the ghost of its past still evident. The first example of this was when I came across the building below.

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    This used to be the station building of Stroud Green station

    Stroud Green station closed to passengers in 1954, but 63 years later its building is still intact. There’s no evidence of how the building links to the railway bridge above, so countless people must pass it every day without ever realising its former purpose.

    Further along where the track once was, there is a work of art inside one of the arches. When you’re walking alone, it’s quite creepy to be honest – even though I knew it was going to be there!

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    Spriggan sculpture

    The most intact platforms on the walk are at Crouch End. As you can see from my photo, it’s obvious that trains used to stop here.

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    Crouch End

    The thing I was most excited about seeing were the Highgate Tunnels. The imposing portals are now a sanctuary for bats. The ground in front of them was too muddy for me to walk across, so I had to zoom in from a distance, but you can still see them.

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    The abandoned Highgate Tunnels

    To rejoin the walk, I had to go up to street level. I was now in Highgate, famous for its middle class mums (as seen in the @Highgatemums Twitter account and book). The next thing to glimpse was the abandoned Highgate High Level station.

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    Overlooking the abandoned Highgate High Level station

    It was near impossible to get a good view of it, but the tunnels I saw earlier emerge here. In a BBC documentary made in 2013 to commemorate the Underground’s 150th anniversary, a Tube driver can be seen on the platforms.

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    Still from BBC documentary The Tube: An Underground History (2013) showing Highgate High Level station

    The walk ends at Alexandra Palace, where the World Darts Championships are held at Christmas every year. However, with a train home to catch I decided to stop after taking in this incredible view over London.

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    Looking over London

    I plan on going back to finish off the walk in the future, but I had a great time doing the bits of it that I did.

  • The pain at the Arsenal

    I have just returned from a brilliant trip to London, where I went to my first Norwich City away match at Arsenal’s Emirates Stadium.

    The plan was to make an event of it, so instead of going straight there and straight back on the coach with other fans I went on the train on Tuesday morning, stayed in a hotel in Finsbury Park and came back on Wednesday lunchtime.

    I was aware that my hotel was within walking distance of the ground, but I didn’t expect to be able to see it from my window!

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    The Emirates Stadium was visible from my hotel room

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    Zoomed in

    I walked to the stadium well before kick off, to properly take in the atmosphere. I had been outside the Emirates once before, but that was during the day when there was no one around. It was a different sight all lit up with thousands of people there.

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    Outside the Emirates

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    Near where the away fans go in

    I made my way to the end where my fellow Norwich fans were going to be sitting, and immediately felt a warmth come over me seeing yellow shirts and hearing familiar songs – I was amongst my own people! With an hour to go before kick off, I went inside and found my seat, giving me my first sight of the pitch.

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    The view from my seat

    Before long the Norwich players came out to warm up at our end, to great applause. There is a real feeling of togetherness about the club at the moment. The fans are right behind the players, the players are putting the effort in for the fans and they are buying into what the manager is trying to do. It’s lovely to see. There were particularly loud cheers for James Maddison, who scored the winner in the derby on Sunday.

     

    Norwich's goalkeepers Angus Gunn and Michael McGovern warm up
    Norwich’s goalkeepers Angus Gunn and Michael McGovern warm up
    The Norwich players preparing for the game
    The Norwich players preparing for the game

    Arsenal have a sort of TV show on the big screens inside the stadium for pre-match, half time and post-match. I don’t really think it works. I’ve seen it done at cricket grounds, and often it’s hard to hear the presenter and a lot of the time you don’t want to because they are really annoying. Arsenal’s presenter didn’t win any friends amongst the Norwich fans by introducing us as Ipswich! That’s pretty much the worst thing you can say about us.

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    This bloke introduced us as Ipswich!

    Then it was the match itself. You probably know that the game went all the way to extra time, with the eventual score being Arsenal 2-1 Norwich. The Norwich players put in a very good performance, going in front in the first half when Josh Murphy finished nicely after running onto a great Maddison pass and defending excellently until the 86th minute when a young guy I’d never heard of called Eddie Nketiah tapped in from a corner 15 seconds after coming on as a substitute for Arsenal. He then scored the winner in the first half of extra time. Norwich had come agonisingly close to pulling off an upset – one they would have deserved – but it wasn’t to be.

    I was proud of the team, though, and very proud to be in the crowd. The nearly 9,000 Norwich fans that were there put the Arsenal fans to shame. Boxer and City fan Anthony Ogogo says he was racially abused by one of our number last night, which is totally unacceptable and that person is merely a sad individual who has nothing to do with this wonderful football club. I certainly didn’t hear anything untoward, and I think we represented the city brilliantly.

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    The Norwich players in a huddle after the game

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    The Canaries thank the fans for their great support

    My first experience of seeing Norwich play on another team’s turf was one I’ll never forget, and one I hope to repeat in the future. We may not have won, we may be out of the cup, but I got a real sense that the club is in good shape at the moment and that if we can carry on performing like we did on Tuesday night then we can achieve something in the league this season.

     

  • The ECB’s new Twenty20 tournament could be make or break for cricket in the UK

     

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    The new Twenty20 tournament would co-exist with the current T20 Blast

     

    The England and Wales Cricket Board have announced a Twenty20 competition to begin in 2020 – their attempt at getting more people interested in cricket.

    It has caused controversy, with some saying it will be the beginning of the end for county cricket and others saying it will keep the game alive in the UK.

    While the domestic game currently has 18 major counties, the proposed tournament will contain eight teams with squads of 15 players each. The teams will most likely take on the names of the cities they are based in, doing away with Surrey and Yorkshire and perhaps introducing London and Leeds.

    This eight team, city-based structure mirrors the hugely successful Big Bash in Australia and the Indian Premier League.

    The plan is for 36 matches to be played over 38 days in the school summer holidays, and for 8 of those matches to be live on free-to-air TV.

    The timing of the tournament could help to attract the best players in the world to it, as only England play regular international cricket at that time of year. Squads may miss England players but will be allowed 3 overseas stars.

    Here are a few thoughts I have about this proposal.

    County cricket is dying anyway

    The County Championship, the oldest and purest cricket championship, has been attended by almost nobody for decades. Counties have a few die-hard members, and some of them will get a few spectators in at the height of the holiday season, but other than that matches are played in front of empty grounds, rendering the four-day competition next to pointless. The Twenty20 tournament is not threatening to end the Championship, but might make enough money to keep it alive. Each county has been promised £1.3 million as part of the proposal.

     

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    A County Championship match takes place in front of not many people at Edgbaston

     

    Will enough matches be on free-to-air TV?

    English cricket has not been live on free-to-air TV since 2005. Since the ECB made the game available only to people who could afford a Sky Sports subscription the number of schoolchildren getting into cricket has dropped dramatically. They know they made a mistake, and while they can’t do anything about it until the end of the current rights deal in 2019, they have ringfenced 8 of the 36 matches for FTA TV in the proposal. I wonder, is that enough? Will it be eight of the early league fixtures, making it difficult to follow, or will it include the semi-finals and the final? Only time will tell, but it seems you’re still going to need a pay TV subscription to have much of an idea of what’s going on.

    Two Twenty20 tournaments could mean overkill

    The ECB are not proposing to replace the current T20 Blast with this city-based tournament – they intend for them to co-exist. This year, the T20 Blast (which does feature all 18 counties) will take place over seven weeks. The new tournament would be planned to start almost immediately after the Blast – I have a feeling even a massive cricket fan like me could get fed up of watching Twenty20 after 12 solid weeks of it.

    While there are questions to be answered, I think overall this is a positive step from the ECB and a genuine attempt to inject new life into cricket in this country. They’ve got three years to get it ready – the future of the sport could depend on them getting it right.

  • Don’t get carried away, but this England team is exciting

     

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    England’s impressive young team made the international break more bearable

     

    I’m never pleased when the international break comes around. They force an irritating halt to domestic football. In September, October and November they make the beginning of the season a stop-start affair; at times like this they make us all pause when our clubs have important matters to attend to.

    That this one should be at the Easter weekend, traditionally a packed four days in the league calendar, made it even less welcome. Norwich City’s back-to-back clean sheets, first win since early January and slice of fortune with the result of the Tyne-Wear derby would have to be put to one side for a fortnight, until the huge game against Newcastle.

    In the meantime, England would play friendlies against Germany and the Netherlands as part of their preparations for Euro 2016. Like many, I wasn’t expecting much. Germany are the world champions and, in Berlin, you’d expect them to sweep England aside.

    This is the reason why what actually happened last night was such a pleasant surprise. From the start, there was an energy about the England team. They were closing the Germans down very well. We are so used to seeing us sit back and watch the opposition pass the ball around in these prestige friendlies, but last night the hosts were not given any time on the ball before a red shirt was trying to hound it off them.

    Germany had a goal incorrectly ruled out for offside, but hey, it’s about time England had some luck (Frank Lampard anyone?). The Germans did go ahead when Toni Kroos took advantage of goalkeeper Jack Butland’s hindered mobility to fire one in at his near post. I am certain that, had he not done damage to himself seconds earlier, the Stoke keeper would have made a routine save.

    In the second half, England were continuing to impress, finding each other well with passes and causing their rivals problems with some clever moves. It seemed unjust when Mario Gomez jumped between Gary Cahill and Nathaniel Clyne to put Germany 2-0 up. It was a scoreline that would have given the ‘same old England’ brigade ammunition but did not tell the story of the match.

    What England were doing was making chances but wasting them. In the end, they had 19 shots on goal – 9 more than Germany – and 6 of them were on target. The Germans only hit the target twice in the whole game, and with stereotypical efficiency, scored two goals.

    Harry Kane provided the spark for an England comeback by reigning in an untidy Jordan Henderson corner and fooled two defenders with a Cruyff turn – so apt in this week of all weeks – before striking it into the corner of the net with pinpoint accuracy.

     

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    Harry Kane sends a German defender for ice cream as he scores England’s first goal in Berlin

     

    With less than twenty minutes to go, Roy Hodgson introduced Jamie Vardy in place of Danny Welbeck. He had been on the pitch for 198 seconds when his audacious backheel from Clyne’s cross wrong-footed Manuel Neuer and brought the scores level. Vardy became the first Leicester City player since Gary Lineker in 1985 to score a goal for England.

    All but the harshest of England supporters would have gladly taken a draw away from the Olympiastadion having been two goals behind with 25 minutes to play. However, in stoppage time, Jordan Henderson finally got one of his corners right and Eric Dier thumped it in with his head to stun the world champions and give England a quite brilliant victory.

     

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    Eric Dier completed the comeback to stun the world champions Germany

     

    I will not get carried away. You can tell me that it was a friendly, that it was an ‘experimental’ German side, that it was a fluke, whatever – it was still a performance to get a little bit excited about. We are not going to win the Euros this summer. We might, however, do ourselves proud while we are there and build towards future tournaments with genuine promise.

    The reason for this optimism is from the players involved in Berlin. We knew Joe Hart would be missing after getting injured in last weekend’s Manchester derby, but no one was particularly worried because we knew that Jack Butland was a more than able deputy. Butland was injured himself in the first half of the match, but Southampton’s Fraser Forster was perfectly capable of filling in. Goalkeeper wise, England have rarely had three as strong as those at the same time.

    In defence, England look to have sorted out the full back positions. Nathaniel Clyne and Danny Rose appeared right at home in the back four, Rose in particular with some excellent tackles, and both were willing to race forward and mount an attack. Gary Cahill is clearly the odd one out, and you would expect John Stones to replace him at some point in the near future and form a partnership with Chris Smalling.

    Eric Dier did an excellent job of protecting the defence and demonstrated his ability to pick out a forward pass. I personally have questions over the Liverpool pair of Henderson and Adam Lallana. Lallana hasn’t had a great season but has the ability, Henderson I wonder if he’s actually just rather ordinary and is mostly ‘a great man to have in the dressing room’. He missed a glorious chance, having his shot blocked by a defender when the keeper had been taken out of the equation, and I wonder if Ross Barkley has more of a place in this team than him.

    The outstanding player for England on a night of very good performances was Dele Alli. It was easy to forget that the Tottenham midfielder is a few weeks away from his 20th birthday. Rarely has an Englishman looked so comfortable on the international stage so early on in their career. His dribbling, his passing and his sheer will to be involved and get on the ball made him more than fit to share a stage with the world champions on the night. He will need careful management but we look to have a real star on our hands here.

     

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    Dele Alli was magnificent on a great night for England

     

    Danny Welbeck often gets a raw deal from the fans but he worked hard for his country, getting into good positions and never allowing the defenders to rest, always niggling away at them. His finishing ability is undoubted, and he has a definite role to play in the squad. Talk of finishing ability – Harry Kane is one of the best we’ve had in that respect for a long time, and Jamie Vardy continues to ride on the crest of a wave. Four years ago, Vardy was playing for Fleetwood Town.

    Then consider what England have in reserve. Leicester’s Danny Drinkwater was in the squad for the first time, rewarded for a sublime campaign for the Premier League leaders, and, in the end, was untried. He will surely get some time on the pitch against the Netherlands on Tuesday. Daniel Sturridge didn’t make it off the bench. There is still Wayne Rooney to come back from injury too.

    This is a very young team too. Take a look at the ages of the starting eleven in this game:

    Jack Butland – 23
    Nathaniel Clyne – 24
    Gary Cahill – 30
    Chris Smalling – 26
    Danny Rose – 25
    Eric Dier – 22
    Jordan Henderson – 25
    Adam Lallana – 27
    Dele Alli – 19
    Danny Welbeck – 25
    Harry Kane – 22

    If Cahill is indeed replaced by 21-year-old Stones, this brings the average age down even further. This is a squad of players who will be around for a while. 30-year-old Rooney would be something of an old man amongst that lot, but might not be the worst player to have as a vastly experienced captain to guide them.

    Four of the starters last night were Tottenham players. I think it showed too, they were linking up with each other superbly. It can only help the national team if the core of the side all play for the same club. Three were Liverpool players, and just one was a Manchester United man. How times change.

    I can honestly say that last night was the best I’d seen England play in a very long time and it felt slightly strange to actually be enjoying watching an international friendly. The future looks bright and if they can play like that more often, maybe I won’t be quite so annoyed when the international break rolls around. Maybe.

  • Same old story on day of change at Carrow Road

     

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    John Ruddy isn’t saving that.

     

    Another day, another disappointment. Norwich City put in a strong shift on Saturday and worked hard to get themselves 2-0 up – but this is no longer the time to be taking the positives. We need to win, we need points and we need to stop the rot.

    For the West Ham game, a lot had been changed at Carrow Road. I don’t just mean the team selection (three alterations from last week) or tactics, but pretty much everything. The players walked out to Kasabian instead of Kanye, we were treated to live opera in the centre circle before kick-off, and – that sure sign that things aren’t going well – clips of the commentary of some of the club’s greatest moments boomed from the speakers in an attempt to fire us up. That last one, in particular, made it feel like the last few months of the Hughton reign all over again.

    I try to be as fair as possible when forming my opinions on City. I’ll leave it a few hours after a draw or defeat before I pass comment, so I can be sure that what’s going through my head isn’t just in the heat of the moment. I still feel that on Saturday Norwich were the better side and did not really look threatened until West Ham scored their rather fortunate first goal.

    We came racing out of the blocks and while we didn’t manage to score in the first few minutes, the approach was correct. West Ham had gone all the way to the end of extra time with Liverpool in their FA Cup fourth round replay just four days previously. They had injury problems. City went out to get on top from the start.

    Robbie Brady scored an excellent goal, which hopefully signals a return to form for him, and the exhilaration around Carrow Road was palpable. There was an even bigger outpouring of joy when Wes Hoolahan doubled the lead. What a position we were in – 2-0 up, 25 minutes to go – would we get a better chance for a Premier League win?

     

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    Robbie Brady gave Norwich City the lead but it wasn’t to last.

     

    Nearly ten minutes later, when West Ham scored, there was a definite feeling around the ground of despair. They had only made it 2-1, but there was an air of ‘here we go again’ as if the crowd just knew that the Hammers would go on to equalise. Or worse.

    The defence was blamed again – but I’m not sure that’s fair this time. Brady made a superb tackle on Victor Moses, but the West Ham substitute got a bit of luck and managed to shoot. The shot was well saved by John Ruddy (who played well on his return to the side, I thought) but the rebound fell kindly for Dimitri Payet. For the equaliser, perhaps Timm Klose could have been slightly stronger but it was a well-spotted pass and a great strike from Mark Noble. I just think it’s too easy at the moment to blame the defence for every goal we concede. Sometimes you have to admit the opposition forced their way through.

    In the end, we had to settle for a point. A point that we say we probably would have taken before the game, but having been 2-0 up it feels like a defeat. City missed the chance to end this horrible winless run and build confidence going forward. Before Saturday’s game, I attempted to predict the outcomes of Norwich’s thirteen remaining games. I came up with three wins, three draws, and seven defeats – ending with 35 points. It’s unlikely to be enough to stay up.

    The worrying thing is I predicted a draw with West Ham…

     

  • Going back ‘home’

    I am prone to spells where I feel out of control and as if I’m ‘going mad’.

    I’ll try not to bore you – this is about the benefits I believe there are to be had in going back to where you felt happiest and safest – but I need to give you some background information first.

    The vast majority of my childhood was spent in the Mile Cross area of Norwich. Those who know it will probably not speak highly of it. It’s not a nice place. But for me, it was home. From when I was a toddler until I had to move away in 2010, aged 17.

    Specifically, it was this house. The one you can see the side of here. That was my bedroom window for nearly 15 years.

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    This is from Google Maps, as I didn’t want to feel awkward taking a photo of what is now someone else’s house.

    You may have seen my old cul-de-sac doing the rounds on the internet actually – as when viewed from above it does rather look like the Millennium Falcon.

    It’s now more than six years since I left, but I admit I just can’t get over it. I still wish I lived there. I still have dreams in which I am back on familiar ground. When I’m having one of my bad spells I think about it even more.

    Today I had a bit of free time so I got in my car and went back to where I still call home.

    Being back there, walking around the area, it was an odd feeling. It was as if my head was properly screwed on – I don’t remember even thinking about where I was going, my feet just took me on a circuit of the estate and right back to where I started.

    You are entitled to think ‘for god’s sake, get over it and move on’, but believe me if it was that easy I would have done it a long time ago.

    Not a great deal has changed. I only glanced at my old house as there was a car in the driveway and I’m not sure how I’d feel if I looked out of the window to see someone staring up at my home, but it was pretty much identical to how it looked when I was there. Although I don’t like their choice of curtains. Our old neighbours are also still there.

    I went down a passageway out of the cul-de-sac and walking round to Bowers Avenue saw the first change. A newly built block of flats.

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    These flats weren’t there when I lived in this area.

    I carried on and came to the biggest buildings on the estate.2016-01-21 12.44.18

    These blocks of flats are unmistakably 1960s, and they are big enough to be seen from Mousehold Heath.

    I ended up going down the hill and taking a walk around Sloughbottom Park, the scene of countless kickabouts with my dad and where I used to train with and play for the Norman Wanderers Under 11s and Under 13s before I realised – some time after everyone else – that I was hopeless at football.

    Looking towards the changing rooms.
    Looking towards the changing rooms.
    Looking towards the main road.
    Looking towards the main road.
    The very same pitch I played on 10 years ago.
    The very same pitch I played on 10 years ago.

    The pitch was in a rather better state than it used to be when I played on it about a decade ago.

    If you’ve made it this far, thank you. You’ve put up with me being rather self-indulgent. But let me explain – I did this to attempt to reconnect with who I used to be. The happy, studious kid I was. For reasons I won’t share here, things went south for me when I stopped living here. So coming back enabled me to get those feelings of safety and security back, if only for an hour or so. Writing this up has helped me make it last that little bit longer.

    Everyone has a place like this. A place where they have memories, a place where they were happy. If you’re feeling down or a bit lost, why not go back to that place? I promise you, it will do you the world of good.